Visit http://web.mac.com/jeffertz for a new post on Eternal Dance and the Space of Flows... Thanks!
Any further posts will appear at http://web.mac.com/jeffertz. Thanks.
10.04.07
To what extent did the avatar I created for and in Second Life represent me? Was its construction a new self or an extension of my self as I am (it is) embodied? Would my engagement within this virtual game/world extend potentialities or would I feel isolated amid all the noise?
Questions of identity and representation are most poignant when I engage SL primarily because the platform offers the user an amazing, yet hierarchical, level of control. In intertwining my recent RL with SL experiences, I hope to explore what either mode of seeing/being/feeling tells me of the other.
I’ve read and seen what proficient SL users are able to do through learning, building, scripting, socializing; fully “equipped” they can do pretty much anything they want to. Users have carved niches and can create more by the right (or opportune) knowhow, so they or their avatars can feel at “home” in the virtual. SL in many respects - the cities, plants, jobs, commerce, exchanges, interactions - mirrors RL (and may extend RL potentiality while limiting SL’s). But I still feel too “young” an SL user to do more than speculate on its broader implications, so I feel it’s best for now to focus on my SL beginnings, which as a new user are all I have.
When I was a “newbee”, as I’ve heard the SL “residents” call the greenhorns, I spent some time orienting myself to the virtual world and doctoring my appearance.
“This is the only shell I will use to operate in SL for a long time,” I told myself, sitting on my parent’s gray couch with my laptop on my lap and dog snoring at my side. “I know I could create new accounts and avatars or change my appearance on a whim, but if I know anything about my real life behavioral patterns this would be the only time I’ll ever alter my avatar.”
I have not purchased any RL clothes for the past seven-or-so years, save running shoes, hiking boots and other miscellaneous functional necessities. Whether I care or not about my appearance is less relevant than the knowledge that my relatives and girlfriend care; every birthday, holiday or any other special occasion over the years has landed me an ever-overflowing closet. They want me to look good, professional, cute, whatever; so I figure my intentions (now limited to outfitting myself) may result in a similar product.
Now, I use “product” intentionally. For a period of time shorter than my abstinence from purchasing clothing, my observations of the functions of brand names (maybe not the brands of clothing themselves but the images or “feel” the likeness of such brands and/or styles generate) have left me a bit disheartened with the ways in which seemingly impersonal objects are tied to “personal expression”. A self-imposed identity seems to be tied to each kind of clothing/style. Why is it that a medium, like television, can make some of us aware that both the virtual and actual are modes of representation while it further entrenches others to materially construct identity? A recorded John Cage phrase always pops in my head when I hear someone talk about (and really feel their mastery over) personal expression.
“Self transcendence, not self-expression,” Cage tells me while I’m standing, listening to two teenaged girls talk about their handbags on the subway.
“That bag is so you,” says the one girl to the other.
“I know isn’t it great?”
“Who is the you?” I ask myself, looking at the immaculately polished duo. They’re donned in pressed slacks, stiletto heels and have caked their faces in makeup. “And can those yous be transcending their selves by formulating their appearances in a very particular (and uniform) way?”
“John, I have come to terms with the fact that any act of creation is one of self-transcendence,” I tell a Cage phrase widget I downloaded while working on a Malian-influenced rhythm at my girlfriend’s home in Philadelphia. For inspiration. “That’s why my practices in music composition have interested me in shared or collaborative composition. But what does one share by dressing to the same ‘standard’ in a world that seems to operate solely on the surface? What can he or she lose?”
I spend a few minutes working out a counterpoint rhythm at my parent’s home in North Jersey before I ask, “does an act of consumption transcend anything? Representation?”
No answer.
The most “populated” places in SL have to do with sexuality and/or consumption. When I visited a body part shop (under the list of most popular places) for the first time, users were equipping their avatars with breast implants, flashing suits and “designer” hair. (Funny how everything in SL is designed by users, and yet many users who could learn to create their wear just purchase the products of others.) At first I felt like I was only playing a game, that I was disembodied, which always seems to be equated to virtual reality. But as I kept exploring and noticed the sensual nature of the users (at the very least by counting the number of sex clubs), I felt that this platform could just be another plane of being in the (networked) world. This plane allows users to live out their fantasies, let’s them do what they can’t (for whatever reason) do in RL. So do they transcend their RL selves by exploring the (SL) world with their avatars the way they really would want to?
I met two sisters in SL, who were dressed to the nines. One just came over and started talking (typing) to me before the other joined in. Yariel and Adinna (the sisters) were eventually joined by their friend Amy29, who flashed me. The three were playful, spanking each other while they talked. Amy29 said she need to get a house in SL.
“Oh yeaaaah for your wedding,” said Adinna.
“Are you getting married in SL?” I ask her through my avatar.
“Yes,” she says. “YAY!!”
Adinna quips that Amy29 should marry Cosmo, who is presumably a RL person.
“I'm already married in rl,” said Amy29.
“So you're virtual self is going to be married to someone different than your husband?” I ask.
“Yes. i’m marryin a man who is married in rl too.”
After Amy29 mentioned that she was role playing in SL, she didn’t want to talk about the distinctions between RL and SL. She wanted to buy some new looks and move on the sex club.
My girlfriend, Erin, and I went to Target over the weekend to buy some fixings for her new place: a toothbrush holder, containers, picture frames, etc. While we sorted through the objects for aesthetics and prices, I kept asking myself whether that assemblage of stuff, once (dis)placed around her room, would contribute to a kind of self-expression. I don’t think it did.
“It’s cozy,” said Erin, once most of the objects, both old and new, were in place.
“It feels warm,” I said, “especially when the sun shines in through the red curtains.”
Despite the choices we made in purchases and how we assembled them, the room seemed to have formed itself. This is a principle I’ve been operating with compositionally for some time. I’ve been imposing limitations in durations, palettes, quantities and dynamics of sound based off the project at hand, my own or another’s goal, and the tools available. Those limitations, with the extent of the variety of potentialities, always seem to meld themselves into a stew that’s just right given the circumstances. So the limitations of material objects we purchased came together in a particular way.
Sure we made distinctions and evaluations, but each act moved us closer toward the “cozy” room. In this case, the “cozy” was an unspecified ideal that if attained would allow us to feel at “home” like we did at the old house. Each component we purchased was a part of this unstated ideal to fill in the blanks of what may or may not be missing. The room ended up completely different from its predecessor, despite its similarities. With its new feel and attributes (like making a right instead of a left when you reach the top of the stairs), we had a new sensibility of what it meant (means) to be in this room. Which is to say, it’s nothing apparently significant.
“So, Mr. Cage,” I think. “Does the room and the acts that helped make it our own contribute to our identities (separate and collective)? Have we transcended ourselves by creating something “new” through assembling purchased items? Is then the room a mark of transcendence - a kind of, “we were/are here”? And if so, is identity then solely context-bound?”
“To act is a miracle and needs everything and every me out of the way,” said Cage.
“Finally an answer!” I type into my computer at Red Thread Productions. “But does that mean there is no such thing as a self, and by extension no other? And is that bit about self-transcendence just a means to let go of formulating an identity at all so as to let go of ownership? My head is spinning; I’m just juggling too much, moving back and forth in RL, SL and between. I didn’t even intend to write this autoethnography today!”
Still at Red Thread, I open the SL login screen, but hesitate. I don’t feel like logging on. I reluctantly type in my password and click the log-in button. (There’s not a lot of work to do today.) As I wait for the screen to load, I figure I should acquaint myself with the video-capturing element of SL for a presentation on the posthuman I’m supposed to give with Toccarra in two days. Shit, I still have to finish the readings. When I try to capture footage in basically an empty space, SL crashes, again.
“Then today is a day to read and reflect upon SL,” I tell myself.
Upon my first entrance into SL, when I didn’t know anything about the platform, game, social implications, etc., I felt newborn; I was literally born into the world when I signed up for my account. The avatar was in the shape of a body, but it was gray. I felt alone and a bit embarrassed - I wasn’t just naked, I had no skin.
It seemed other new users being born into SL’s introductory island were moving along more quickly than I was. A few of them came up and asked, “Why don’t you put some clothes on?”
“Because I don’t know how.”
Technical skills come into play in SL in a big way. But you can just wander around and talk to people, even join or facilitate a social network without doing much more than clicking a button or asking your RL friends to sign on. The platform can act in a number of different ways. For learning purposes, my Ethnography and New Media class has met on SL a couple of times now. Our discussions on September 30 at Curie Creations & Gothinger Ink were more interesting than any I’d had on SL so far because our intentions were the same. Gothotta was our host that evening, and his user met his RL wife in SL. In SL, Gothotta works in appearances (he creates tattoos in Photoshop in RL so avatars can pay to download them onto their “bodies” in SL. His wife, whose avatar is Jinger, came to meet us in his shop later - Gothotta said she was shopping (in SL).
When I first downloaded SL and finally got rid of the kinks (so I could alter my appearance for the first time), I eagerly began constructing my avatar “self”. Why was I so eager? There was no ideal me I wanted to create, no cool representation, no virtual recapitulation. Did my anticipation come from the fact that this was just a fun exercise that allowed me to revisit the Nintendo-era, childhood-video-game self I had long discarded, or was I anticipating a kind of statement I would make with my appearance that moved me closer toward the self-expression I stood back from in RL?
From my pre-SL understanding to my recent experiences, most users mold their avatars as a virtual body to be sleek, sexy, muscular, or to resemble aspects of their RL selves in some way. There are obviously exceptions like myself, but I have yet to see them. Therein lies the problem I’m having right now: I’m already referring to my avatar as an exception. Truth is, it operate like the others (teleporting, flying, talking), and I receive some level of enjoyment and/or insight from its dealings. It’s quite far from an exception, even though the physical attributes of my avatar, No Schridde, are (No is a fat, pale, weird-looking thing).
So where does the boundary between my avatar and myself exist, if there is one? Is it distinct, or does it move around, grow bold or de-saturate depending on the circumstance? Is RL embodiment extended in SL or is it a new or alternative construction? Am I able to transcend my RL self in SL? Is my identity in SL a product then of not just myself but of all the avatars and the users that experience them and cause all other users to experience? I can’t tell. I have more questions now that I asked. I don’t know, I can’t concentrate anymore.
“Projects involving many people and many interruptions go well,” Cage tells me.
“That still doesn’t tell me anything about RL and its representations versus SL and its representations,” I say to the screen of my computer.
I’m just going to have to continue to operate within SL, take notes and compare my SL actions, feelings and desires to those in RL. Maybe I won’t be able to come up with any answers, at least nothing that just an interface can give me. At the very least, I don’t think I’ll be able to get any answers by talking to a widget.
While I started this ethnography with questions of representation, identity and embodiment as a stated purpose, my baseline of inquiry centered on juggling various (real and second) life components. I have to physically travel between New York, New Jersey and Pennsylvania almost every week - not to mention my virtual travels. Throughout this sometimes overwhelming process and given my ambitions and field of study, I always need to be connected (to the Internet, people, etc.). With this autoethnographic experiment I can see that there is very little separation between RL and what I do virtually - VR is just an extension of RL. They just both contribute to a kind of confusion that is so unsteady it can sometimes be stable.
{{{{{{{{{{{{A conversation generated by Shelley Jackson’s “Stitch Bitch: The Patchwork Girl” and Ken Hillis’ “From Description to Depiction: Free Indirect Discourse and Online Graphical Chat”}}}}}}}}}}}}
At the present moment, which is the same as saying any given or none taken, I am split between tasks, the to-do’s of the everyday and this day. It’s not just a particular presence of my body (as Shelley suggests) but also the focus of my mind that are patchworks, constantly being stitched and re-sewn, ripped out, trashed and recycled. “I am a loose aggregate, a sort of old fashioned cabinet of curiosities, interesting in pieces but much better as a composite.” (Shelley, 248) I’m in the middle.
If I were to follow Hillis, it would actually be my Second Life avatar in the middle. It’s between me and a viewer, whose middle would also be an avatar. It is in this way that avatars “work to create a ‘shattered’ sense of self through the use of emblematics (the bringing together of text and image) coupled with a reformulated use of free indirect discourse.” (Hillis, 73) In SL, the image and text meld into this kind of chat that is at times distancing and comforting. The augmentation of real life bodies via virtuality works to “achieve an indirect distancing from their own embodiment, a distancing that sutures them more directly to the middle ground/middle voice of the screen environment itself.” (Hillis, 82)
With my avatar an actor of sorts (Hillis, 76) that through extensive use melds my self and sense of embodiment into SL, the explicit ownership of my avatar is taken away, so it is not mine but more our avatar. It protects my political subjectivity, and allows me to create multiple renditions of patches of me as avatars. This is a result of what Hillis calls an “age-old desire for action at a distance” that can be found in our interactions with avatars, which “can act experientially as a body-as-emblem and thereby encourage or move individuals to think of their relationships to the lived world around them in the same manner.” (84) There-in lies the danger, but also the possibility for examining user behaviors/functions in SL to probe their replicates in RL. I feel to do so, one must focus on the constitution of self.
Shelley texts this new kind of self bleeds in the middle, a “banished” body that “is a hybrid of thing and thought, the monkey in the middle.” (Shelley, 246) The patchwork of object and subject constructed wears thin first at the body, before unraveling the mind: “the more garbage we pack into that magical body the more we fear it, and the more chance there is that it will turn on us, begin to speak, accuse us.” (Shelley, 246) So the self and the text then should think of its selves “as a mesh of relationships.” (Shelley, 246) that feed off each other in this patchwork of self. Wouldn't they then be interdependent?
“Boundaries of texts are like boundaries of bodies, and both stand in for the confusing and invisible boundary of the self.” (Shelley, 249) But what if the body and the text are one in the same, given it is what we image “that animates us, not just texts, but also people” (Shelley, 252)? Would SL as a virtual world be a novel of variant texts, each scripting one another to each other? Who would the authors be, the avatars or the users? And then who would be the users?
It’s strange to think of how similar the modes of functioning within SL parallel the Alternative Reality Kit, an Xerox Corporation interface of the late 1980’s discussed by Randall B. Smith in “Experiences With The Alternate Reality Kit: An Example of the Tension Between Literalism and Magic.” Smith uses the dialectic literalism and magic to discern the properties of what was largely an interface based off of the metaphor of the physical world (RL). These RL objects within the interface are metaphors because they have an image, position, velocity and can experience forces (62). In SL those attributes can be expressed with the avatars themselves (they have a virtual body, can walk and sit). According to Smith, ARK (as with SL) was a stronger simulation because it did not entirely focus on one metaphor but had “magical” agents/properties.
“Literalism can be carried too far.” (67) While in SL users can and do act as if they were in the real world (dealing in relationships, exchanges, commerce, dance), they do so in a magical way (through odd visualizations, drop down menus and scripts). Conversation is mostly textual (though there is a new function to speak), avatars can teleport and fly, users can create objects with scripts to do pretty much whatever they want (and can technically do).
The tension between literalism and magic exposes the former’s limitations and the latter’s obscurity (63). But it is the “highly magical objects (that) are of central importance in the ARK strategy for enabling intuitive understanding of a simulation’s interaction rules.” (65) Those rules, however implemented, are constrained by forces external to the simulation and user. “Input devices, computer performance limitations, or other constraints can cause the metaphor to be violated in a way that does not necessarily enhance functionality.” (64) How many times I’ve been kicked out of SL...........
Ok, I think I can use Paul Dourish’s notion of context to flush out Hallnas and Redstron (in 10.09 blog below). Again, my concern with their move from use to presence lies in their use of the concept of “expressionals”, which denotes that there is an inherent expressiveness of things. I was intrigued with their notion that computational things should be looked at more in terms of meaningful presence than efficient use, but was unsettled at the idea that there is any underlying truth as it exists as such (which their diction in some instances to imply). Focusing on aesthetics almost got me, but my problem with Hallnas and Redstron is the way they don’t explicitly address context.
Dourish’s essay, “What we talk about when we talk about context”, speaks of context as part of a feedback loop (though he doesn’t use that term) in where “contextuality is a relational property” (22). Hallnas and Redstron seem to treat context, particularly in relation to designing computational things and the essence of those things, in a positivistic way - that the context can describe features of the environment where an activity takes place, but is separate from the activity (22). It is, in my opinion, to take context as “an emergent feature of the interaction, determined in the moment and in the doing.” (23) If context is emergent, autoethnography not only becomes worthwhile but important. (See how to create an autoethnography posting below for criteria.)
With context as “a feature of interaction” and using the equation, practice+context=meaning (24), conducting first-person research in a manner that is delineated or grows from the observation/interaction is necessary. The practice of the observed is in part conditioned from their context, which during a study would include the researcher/ethnographer. What meaning the ethnographer constructs is then in part emblematic of their own experience, and their goal is to elicit an emotive understanding of the subject(s) of inquiry. Then questions of context “are questions of practice.” (25)
I would like to return to presence as it is a very useful way of discerning material and computational objects, but only to ask a question. In Second Life, how is the presence of the world-as-object felt? (Differently depending on context, which is to say practice or the user’s level of engagement.) How does a deep feeling of presence of SL and the additional artifacts one personally relates really effect RL?
Lars Hallnas and Johan Redstron, in “From Use to Presence: On the Expressions and Aesthetics of Everyday Computational Things”, argue for a reconsideration of the constitution of things: that is, in understanding and designing in a world permeated with an overabundance of computational things one needs to move from defining those things in terms of their (efficient) use to their (meaningful) presence. The presence of things does not refer to their physical existences, "but rather the existence of things in our everyday life based on an act of acceptance; we give things a place in our lives as we turn to them and let them enter our life" (108). So for things to be present, they don't even have to physically be there, as long as they are "on the level of lifeworlds" (108).
Shifting from primarily looking at things in terms of their function to understanding how they play roles in our lives, acknowledges that our lives are intertwined with objects to the extent that each person and object act in shaping the other’s identities. Once say the cell phone becomes ubiquitous in a person’s life, it tends to intensify the connection the user has to it (109). In what I would call more extreme instances, people utilize their cell phones to express their selves to the extent that they become more attached to the aesthetic of the object as a personal identifier than the usefulness of that object. They customize their phones through casings or stickers. An existential understanding of the cell phone as personal object in this way then cannot be entirely generalized because the specific thing resonates with a specific personal in a particular way. This is why when an object disappears from everyday use and it surfaces months or even years later it resonates with the user - the object has become part of that person’s lifeworld.
We choose specific objects; accept them in this way so “that a thing becomes the bearer of meaningfulness through its expressiveness.” (113) By giving a thing an “expression-identity” as Hallnas and Redstron argue is to suppose that a thing’s identity is created through various applications: the functional intent of the design, the aesthetic intent of the design, and the general and personal acceptance and/or rejection of both on the consumer level. Context then becomes an important factor in determining a thing’s and a person’s expressiveness. But I keep getting confused. The general and specific don’t seem to interplay as well as I would like in this argument. Maybe I just can’t quite see it.
Hallnas and Redstron don’t clarify the “expressiveness” of things enough to satisfy me. To a certain extent I feel the word is problematic, since it could suppose one expresses his or her self as a kind of truth in and of itself when the context(s) of engagement and interaction force that understanding to constantly shift. By introducing aesthetics as a means “to understand the logic of an expression on the basis of understanding the material that builds the expression” (115), Hallnas and Redstron affirm the interplay of variables and materials that create an expression. But they go back again to say that to understand expressions “we have to search for intrinsic properties of their expression-identities, that is, basic properties of computational expressionals.” (116) If those generalities are like discerning expression-identities in terms of space (display of results) and time (computation), then I can move forward. But their example in designing a cell phone as an expressional is “designing it on the basis of a collection of ... expressions associated with the phones and phoning” (119) throws me off again. That kind of design seems to focus on intended use, which in the case of the cell phone is already established. Hallnas and Redstron say that both considerations of an object - use and presence - are complimentary, and I’m going to have to for now make that my starting point.
Ellis and Bochner's “Autoethnography, Personal Narrative, Reflexity” detailed how to write an autoethnography in the form of an autoethnography, a kind of personal narrative that contains social implications. I thought it best to list the main tenets of writing one:
- detail context
- posit writer as character
- tell a story
- include personal feelings and thoughts
- any "facts" are not independent of word choice
- detail contingencies (expose race, class, etc.)
- try and understand a lived experience emotionally
- document details of each moment
- explore fears and doubts, pain
- connect personal to cultural
- look outward to social and cultural aspects of experience, then inward
- life and narrative connected
- the self is indistinguishable from the life-story it constructs from what' it has been given, what it experienced and what it wants
- the purpose of an autoethnography is that we need to be brought into worlds of experience that are unknown to us
- stories put us in conversations with readers and ourselves
- start by writing a draft of your story, thinking of it as taking retrospective field notes
- remember you are creating a story - it is not there waiting to be found
- try to remember the scene emotionally
- move in and out between emotion and fact
- be vulnerable and readers will respond that way
- know its important to think with a story as well as about it
- it seems you only learn the importance of your story as you write it (to make it stand out from others)
- intensive interviews only require a few people, but with multiple interviews to establish trust and let them comment on your transcripts.
- form evolves during research
Connected to the Posthuman
Steven Shaviro constructed “Connected, or What It Means to Live in the Network Society” as a work of “cultural theory as science fiction” (ix). He wrote the text as a “‘cognitive mapping’ of postmodern space” that operates in realm of the not-yet-happened. “It addresses events in their potentiality” (xi). Though the narrative voice is written in the future tense and the content of the text addresses potentialities, it does so indirectly. It presents a kind of fog comprised of theories and stories that, unlike the 1980 John Carpenter horror film, is filled with all kinds of potentialities we can’t yet see. “Connected” blurs the distinction between past and future within the (reading) present because its focus on the future (in content and tense) leans on past instantiations of societal change. Instead, it seems Shaviro just leaves us with space work with. “Connected” as a posthuman work of science fiction “shows us how profoundly we are haunted by the ghosts of what has not yet happened.” (250)
Science fiction novels are utilized in “Connected” factually, representationally and/or emotionally to illustrate or deconstruct a slew of concepts/ideas surrounding the posthuman. Shaviro then maps them into a kind of networked web in where each distinct passage can connect to a variety of others. For example, one sci-fi story’s dealings with a theme, emotions-as-weakness, (140) inevitably lead to discussions of power relationships. While works of science fiction as his media examples (coupled with art installations and others) are important for formulating Shaviro’s platform/probe, I feel discussing those texts within this analysis is fruitless to some extent. The more worthwhile exercise for me was to connect as many nodes as I could in different ways. Shaviro’s insights into and because of these works are, for my purposes, points for further discussion. I just don’t want the texts themselves to get in the way (we shouldn’t be debating about whether the mind can really be downloaded, but the limitations and/or possibilities using such a metaphoric understanding).
To summarize what I feel are Shaviro’s more useful points: space has usurped time; anything can be had within the network society for the right price, with information and money (which has moved further from its materiality) as the common measures of exchang; there is a generally perceived emptiness associated with the introduction of new media; experience/feeling/analog space is missing; and that science fiction is cast upon the present in its varying potentialities.
The ideas/concepts Shaviro addresses may be more fertile in the context of my own experience/examples. So that is why No Schridde (my avatar) and Thario Botha (Toccarra’s avatar) will record a conversation(s) in SL concerning the concepts Shaviro has presented from a more literal posthuman perspective. As avatars, our discussion may or may not differ from a RL discussion. I anticipate we’ll touch on the following topics/topic groupings and questions/statements as best we can (Note, I have reformatted some statements as questions):
time and space/distance.......“the space of flows”-----------------------
“Time has become elastic. It has lost its forward thrust.” (103)
Space now organizes time. (130) “the overall subordination of time to space.” (131)
“The space of flows has been freed from the constraints of duration” so that distance is abolished. “The predominant form of human interaction in this space is networking.” Networking just means being connected in VR and RL, like strip malls in a sea of asphalt. (131-2)
space of place used to be community (132)
Can distance be made intimate? (107)
embodiment/alienation/detachment------------------------------------------
Transactions, relationships and thought exist in cyberspace, but do bodies? (87)
“the prison of the body” (91)
VR is often equated with disembodiment. (99)
In RL, words are divorced from things and separated from bodies. So how is SL or VR different? (98)
Technologies allow us to extend ourselves. Do we tend to recognize them as forces alien to ourselves? And with each new technology, do we lose a part of the real for the virtual? “This is why every cultural innovation is attended by an ambivalent sense of loss.” And why we may equate virtual with disembodied when the virtual could in fact just be a prosthetic (104).
“confused encounters” between RL and VL are intrinsic to the way virtual works
Derrida’s supplement of the subject: “An actual self can only exist if it is coupled with a virtual, anonymous prothesis; an immediate present can only be experienced if it is grounded in the pastness of memory; and an analog to the interface to the world can only function if it is patched into a network of digital processors.” (111)
What we say matters less than that we say it in the network. (133)
emotion/feeling-----------------------------------------------------------------------
“Warhol realizes that, like on TV, every emotional state is really just a performance.” (72) He doesn’t believe death as tragic, since fascination usurped kinds of emotion, such as love, which are always accompanied by an idea of what certain events should make us feel. The postmodern/posthuman equivalent of love is one where subject and object never meet (73).
Simulation sickness. (108)
We can override aesthetic responses, but can’t stop ourselves from having them. In this sense beauty is different from other feelings. (125)
Calculation must trump passion - every sign of emotion i weakness. (140) POWER
Semiotic AIDS: Ambient Information Distress Syndrome. This is where a person is so overwhelmed by the loads of info pouring over him or her. (141) POWER
representation/identity/other/perception-------------------------------------
Guy Debord puts the spectacle as an alienating event under the auspice that life can be directly lived, while Andy Warhol believes that “representations are themselves the only reality there is.” (71) A medium, like television, then makes us aware that everything, from the virtual to the actual, are representations.
Is there no real world beyond the apparent? (86)
So the surface of things and of the media are already the same, inwhere beauty is an effect not cause of identity. (74)
celebrity as fundamental mode a appearance - everyone famous for 15 minutes?
“To be is to be perceived.” (78)
Minds as computers? As seen by cognitive scientists, “minds, on the model digital computers, as information processors that work by performing logical operations upon internal representations of external phenomena.” which is to say “that our experience is already virtual.” (83)
“To be online is already to be perceived.” (85) even without an audience.
Nietzsche vs Berkley: if we accept everything are just appearances, Nietzsche says everything changes and has to be reinvented anew, while Berkley says nothing changes (things are just confirmed). (86)
The soul as virtual portion of being sets constraints and conditions of possibility. (92)
“Today, reality is just an echo of fiction” (145).
power/control-------------------------------------------------------------------------
“It’s hard to ‘speak truth to power’ when your very act of speaking is being marketed as entertainment.” (76-7)
Burroughs doesn’t believe virtuality to be the problem, but that the Real and its materiality imprisons us. (91)
Is the power that enslaves us more concerned with what we think or with what we do? Is its effect the affective separation of mind and body? Is the soul both jailer and jail? (91)
Money is the glue: without it nothing is possible. (94) It is the “index of the world’s degree of reality.” (95) And money itself is becoming more virtual and complex, and organizes us.”We have seen, in various ways, how the phenomena of virtual reality-from cyberspatial disembodiment to prosthetic hyperembodiment, and from distributed, artificial intelligence to concentrated corporeal enhancement-all depend on the frantic exchange and circulation of money, or on what Marx called accelerated turnover of capital.” And developments of VR technologies coincides with virtualization of money.(128)
Financial speculation and electronic media are locked in positive feedback loop. (129)
power no longer on owners of means of production, but mediated by their privileged access to flows and connections. (136)
Corporations make workers depend on their resources and support, but it doesn’t give them up readily. (139)
WWII was the testing ground for new electronic media that were to be the foundation for control. The postmodern technologies like TV, surveillance, tracking devices were originally created for military use in tandem with the rocket. (147)
The body has not disappeared with technology, not even in Second Life. Instead “a certain kind of subjectivity has emerged.” (193) This subjectivity cannot be placed within a frame of generalizations or overall trends, but is performative and “always to some extent improvisational.” (197) Avatars navigating SL for the first time have no choice to improvise their virtual existence as they probe the “world” and their avatar’s functions. Inevitably this randomness leads to pattern, and habits form.
When I first entered SL’s world no June 21, 2007 I jotted down a few notes:
“i’m naked. the sound of the rain and strange rats fill the air. people are learning to fly. the newbees buzz around the introductory island. i’m still naked. others are trying to teach me how to change my appearance. really all i want are clothes.”
It seems I felt a need to conform by clothing myself and reshaping my avatar. I can’t remember if I felt ashamed being naked in SL or if I felt I could do no exploring unless I was fully dressed. Either way, despite my RL dress, I had extended myself in SL, feeling the need to operate as I would in RL: performing a self. (I found out later, it took some time for the program to download the world and wouldn’t let me manipulate my avatar until it finished.)
SL is still new to me. I have formed no routine and still experiment, usually finding out the laws of the land in the process. (Example: I tried building an object the other day while in Los Angeles. I couldn’t make it do anything, nor could I figure out how to take it with me. So I left it. Today (Sept. 26) I get an email from SL saying:
“The object 'Second Life' has sent you a message from Second Life: Your object 'Object' has been returned to your inventory lost and found folder from parcel 'Downtown Los Angeles' at Los Angeles 144.25, 77.5 due to parcel auto return.
= Second Life is owned by Langdon Holdings
= Location unknown.”
I have met others who duplicate their RL experiences and form routines, but tend to extend themselves in SL. I got into a conversation with two sisters (Yariel and Adinna) and their friend (Amy29) about what they did in SL.
While they had their routine, there were few oddities, the most striking being Amy29’s. She said she was married in RL and was getting married to someone else in SL. Being embodied in SL (with possibility coupled with context and RL habits) created the circumstances for the faux marriage, wherein the “embodiment creates context by forging connections between instantiated action and environmental conditions.” (203) This includes the computer platform that mediates. “Formed by technology at the same time that it creates technology, embodiment mediates between technology and discourse by creating new experiential frameworks that serve as boundary markers for the creation of corresponding discursive systems.” (205)
[Halyes, N. Katherine. How We Became Posthuman: Virtual Bodies in Cybernetics, Literature, and Informatics]
Pasted below is the conversation I had with Amy29, Adinna and Yariel on Alady Island’s body shop mall that led up to entering the sex club:
[18:29] Gesture is missing from database.
[18:29] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Petton Dwi, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:30] Teleport System Click for Teleport Menu owned by Tracey Sassoon gave you 'Shapes N Skins Locations' ( http://slurl.com/secondlife/Alady%20Island/66/91/720 ).
[18:30] You: shue
[18:31] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations No Schridde, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:31] You: why do you want to take my picture?
[18:32] Yariel Rau: cause your so cute
[18:32] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Petton Dwi, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:32] You: ah. thank you. it took quite a bit of work to look this good.
[18:33] Yariel Rau: :o)
[18:33] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Constant Idler, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:33] Yariel Rau: thank you hun
[18:33] Yariel Rau: :o)
[18:33] You: What are you doing here?
[18:33] Yariel Rau: ,y sister tped me over here
[18:34] Yariel Rau: to look for angel wings
[18:34] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Ashlyne Shepherd, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:34] You: that's sweet. is she paying for them?
[18:34] Yariel Rau: no i wish ...she is cheap
[18:35] Yariel Rau: what are you doing here?
[18:35] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Anth Carnell, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:35] You: i'm not sure where here is. i only signed in a couple of times so far.
[18:35] Yariel Rau: aww how do you like SL?
[18:36] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Hello Mouse Canning, you can be the next winner, so don't go anywhere!
[18:36] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Lyneal Dwi, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:36] You: it's disorienting, but i'm getting into it. how long have you been on?
[18:37] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations No Schridde, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:37] Yariel Rau: a lil over a month and a half
[18:38] You: how's it been for you? have you done anything like this before?
[18:38] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Petton Dwi, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:38] Yariel Rau: its interesting i explore and stuff meet new people like you
[18:39] You: i'm not sure whether i'm playing a game or socializing.
[18:39] Yariel Rau: its both :o)
[18:39] Yariel Rau: oh look and here is my sister
[18:39] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Desiree Messmer, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:39] Adinna Rau: ....
[18:40] You: hi sister.
[18:40] Adinna Rau: Hi...No.
[18:40] You: no what?
[18:40] Yariel Rau: lol your name silly
[18:40] Adinna Rau: Is this your boyfriend, Yariel?
[18:40] You: oh. that's right. kind of an odd choice for a name.
[18:40] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Avril Slade, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:40] You: you can have boyfriends in here?
[18:41] Adinna Rau: You can have everything in here.
[18:41] Yariel Rau: oh yeah you can do ALOT of things here no
[18:41] You: the most exciting thing i've been able to do so far is fly.
[18:41] Yariel Rau: lol
[18:41] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Adinna Rau, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:41] Yariel Rau: then your in for some treats
[18:42] Adinna Rau shouts: YAY I GOT A DOLLAR
[18:42] Adinna Rau: Hi Am--WTF?
[18:42] You: i got my first dollar here.
[18:42] Adinna Rau: Nice..PJs
[18:42] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Hello Mouse Canning, you can be the next winner, so don't go anywhere!
[18:42] Amy29 Allen: i know
[18:42] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:42] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations galu Capalini, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:42] Amy29 Allen: i was sleepin on here
[18:43] Yariel Rau: wb amy
[18:43] Adinna Rau: Oh, sorry lol
[18:43] Adinna Rau: Can I live with you? Yariel's a slacker
[18:43] Adinna Rau: And won't buy me a house
[18:43] Amy29 Allen: i finally get to wear my newest preg outfit
[18:43] Yariel Rau: i will you heefer
[18:43] Adinna Rau: WELL THEN DO IT YOU HOOFER
[18:43] You: who has a home?
[18:43] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Ashlyne Shepherd, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:44] Amy29 Allen: ME!!
[18:44] Yariel Rau: amy does
[18:44] Adinna Rau: Amy has a home.
[18:44] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:44] Amy29 Allen: well a condo like thingy
[18:44] Yariel Rau: me and adinnna are gypsies
[18:44] You: are all three of you friends. what do you mean, gypsies?
[18:44] Adinna Rau: Yariel is my unfortunate sister and Amy and I know each other. :P
[18:44] Yariel Rau: we dont have a home we just wander around homeless..lol
[18:44] Amy29 Allen: Adinna are you pregnat??
[18:44] Adinna Rau: WTF no!
[18:44] Yariel Rau: whomp
[18:45] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:45] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Adinna Rau, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:45] Adinna Rau: YAY I GOT ANOTHER DOLLAR
[18:45] Amy29 Allen: then why do you have your skirt yanked high a nd dri for
[18:45] You: from real life or SL? Amy, did you just make a gesture?
[18:45] Amy29 Allen: yes
[18:45] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:45] Adinna Rau: lmao.. lemme change my outfit.. >_>
[18:45] Amy29 Allen: lols
[18:45] Amy29 Allen: lols
[18:46] Amy29 Allen: arn't i just so nice
[18:46] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations No Schridde, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:46] Amy29 Allen: i almost lived here once
[18:46] You: lived as what?
[18:46] Amy29 Allen: WOOT!!WOOT!!
[18:46] Amy29 Allen: you just wone a dollar
[18:46] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:47] Amy29 Allen: i'm drinkin my 3 coke today
[18:47] You: it's my third so far. i could sit here and talk and gesture for the dollars.
[18:47] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:47] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations No Schridde, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:47] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:47] Amy29 Allen: well
[18:47] Yariel Rau: your not gonna want to when you see what else you can do in sl
[18:48] You: like waht?
[18:48] Amy29 Allen: i think i missed somethin
[18:48] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations galu Capalini, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:48] Yariel Rau: no is new
[18:48] Amy29 Allen: ooooooooo
[18:48] Amy29 Allen: ok
[18:48] Amy29 Allen: lols
[18:48] Yariel Rau: and his only joy in sl so far is flying
[18:48] Adinna Rau: Amy why are you soooooo tall?
[18:48] Amy29 Allen: then i did miss somethin
[18:48] Amy29 Allen: hills
[18:49] Amy29 Allen: can't live with them but can't live with out them
[18:49] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:49] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Constant Idler, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:49] Adinna Rau: BOM CHICA WAH WAH!!!!!!!
[18:49] Adinna Rau: You can go dancing..
[18:49] Adinna Rau: And shopping
[18:49] Adinna Rau: And... driving
[18:49] Adinna Rau: And flying..
[18:49] You: i know flying
[18:49] Amy29 Allen: and have some fun in bed >:-)
[18:49] Adinna Rau: Don't do the last two with Amy though.. she'll kill you
[18:49] Amy29 Allen: what
[18:49] Amy29 Allen: me
[18:50] Amy29 Allen: no
[18:50] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:50] Adinna Rau: HAHAHAHA!
[18:50] Amy29 Allen: i would never thin it
[18:50] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Ashlyne Shepherd, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:50] Adinna Rau: Skydiving
[18:50] Adinna Rau: ...Jetskiing
[18:50] Amy29 Allen: i want that one
[18:50] Amy29 Allen: i love that gesture
[18:50] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Hello Mouse Canning, you can be the next winner, so don't go anywhere!
[18:50] Adinna Rau: lol.. I got it from Mr. P's
[18:50] Amy29 Allen: i'm good at jet skiin
[18:50] Adinna Rau: Nooo! you aint..
[18:50] You: are they games within SL?
[18:50] Amy29 Allen: i ran her over
[18:51] Adinna Rau: Games? Like.. gambling?
[18:51] Adinna Rau: They have casinos.
[18:51] Amy29 Allen: 10 TIMES!!!!
[18:51] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Amy29 Allen, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:51] Amy29 Allen: YAY!!
[18:51] You: no, like jet skiing?
[18:51] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:51] You: more money.
[18:51] Amy29 Allen: Adinna i love your hair
[18:51] Amy29 Allen: oooppps
[18:52] Amy29 Allen giggles
[18:52] Amy29 Allen: >>>>>>>>>> *GIGGLES* <<<<<<<<<<
[18:52] Adinna Rau: Thanks
[18:52] Adinna Rau: Uhm.. yeah, what else can you do..
[18:52] Amy29 Allen: i thaught yariel was Adinna
[18:52] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:52] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Anth Carnell, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:52] Adinna Rau: You can build things. I'm bad at th--....Ew.
[18:52] Amy29 Allen: I'M GOOD AT IT
[18:52] Yariel Rau: LOL
[18:52] Amy29 Allen: lols
[18:52] Adinna Rau: Like.. houses and clothes.. whatever you can think of, you can build it. I just don't know how to
[18:53] You: how do you get land without paying us dollars for it?
[18:53] Amy29 Allen: can't can you
[18:53] Adinna Rau: ...Work really hard in SL lmao
[18:53] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Ashlyne Shepherd, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:53] Amy29 Allen: lols
[18:53] Amy29 Allen: that works
[18:53] Amy29 Allen: i just haven't got paid for it :-/
[18:53] You: what do you mean, SL lmao?
[18:54] Amy29 Allen: i'm gettin paid 4.5K
[18:54] Adinna Rau: Second life.
[18:54] Adinna Rau: WTF, Gimme some of that money. :3
[18:54] Amy29 Allen: if she will buy the damn Ls :-/
[18:54] Amy29 Allen: i need it
[18:54] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Ashlyne Shepherd, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:54] Amy29 Allen: i have to find a house to rent or somethin
[18:54] Adinna Rau: Oh yeaaaah for your wedding
[18:54] Adinna Rau: Oh yeah, you can get married.
[18:54] You: are you getting married in SL?
[18:54] Amy29 Allen: we only have 7 days left on out rent on the condo
[18:55] Adinna Rau: Amy is.
[18:55] Amy29 Allen: yes
[18:55] Amy29 Allen: YAY!!
[18:55] You: in real life too?
[18:55] Adinna Rau: Yariel, marry Cosmo.
[18:55] Amy29 Allen: i'm already married in rl
[18:55] You: oh. are you marrying the same person in SL?
[18:55] Amy29 Allen: i'm gettin married pregnat
[18:55] Amy29 Allen: no
[18:55] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Mouse Canning, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:55] Yariel Rau: ? why
[18:55] Amy29 Allen: he's to stuck up to get on
[18:55] Adinna Rau: So he can get us a house. Duh.
[18:55] Yariel Rau: im gonna get the house on my own
[18:56] Amy29 Allen: he thinks games are imature
[18:56] Amy29 Allen: i said well i guess i'm imature
[18:56] You: so you're virtual self is going to be married to someone different than your husband?
[18:56] Adinna Rau: .....This is a dejavu moment right now
[18:56] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:56] Amy29 Allen: yes
[18:56] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Amy29 Allen, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:56] You: congrats
[18:56] Amy29 Allen: i'm marryin a man who is married in rl too
[18:56] Amy29 Allen: lols
[18:56] Yariel Rau: lol
[18:56] You: how do you find each other?
[18:57] Amy29 Allen: we're both married
[18:57] Yariel Rau: cosmo has a g/f in rl
[18:57] Yariel Rau: lmao
[18:57] Amy29 Allen: i forgot how
[18:57] You: does that feel weird or just like a game?
[18:57] Adinna Rau: So does Decoda xD
[18:57] Amy29 Allen: lols
[18:57] Yariel Rau: mmm more like rolepaly ..yes
[18:57] You: so its both
[18:57] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Petton Dwi, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:57] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Hello deia Klaar, you can be the next winner,so don't go anywhere!
[18:57] Adinna Rau: I just treat it as a game. :/
[18:57] Amy29 Allen: ok you have me confused
[18:57] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:58] You: so am i.
[18:58] Amy29 Allen: OMG!!!!
[18:58] Amy29 Allen: i am preg the test just came back
[18:58] Yariel Rau: yes its a game but there is a person behind every avi soooo somtimes emotions /feelings kinda evolve i dunno its weird
[18:58] Amy29 Allen: WOOT!!WOOT!!
[18:58] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:58] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations deia Klaar, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[18:58] Amy29 Allen: party at my house
[18:58] You: congrats! you just took a real pregnancy test while on SL?
[18:58] Adinna Rau: YAY, LETS GO
[18:58] Yariel Rau: no can i have your baby :o)
[18:59] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Hello deia Klaar, you can be the next winner, so don't go anywhere!
[18:59] Amy29 Allen: no
[18:59] Amy29 Allen: back off
[18:59] Amy29 Allen: lol
[18:59] You: sure.
[18:59] Adinna Rau: Yeah, make another baby and give it to me. :P
[18:59] Amy29 Allen: look i've had well i forgot how many but that's beside the point
[18:59] Adinna Rau: HAHAHAHA!
[18:59] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations No Schridde, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[19:00] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Hello deia Klaar, you can be the next winner, so don't go anywhere!
[19:00] You: instead of making a baby, can you make me a monkey?
[19:00] Adinna Rau: They have monkeys. :/ Somewhere....
[19:00] Adinna Rau: SOUKI!
[19:00] Amy29 Allen: lols
[19:00] Amy29 Allen: i just snorted in rl laughin so hard
[19:00] Adinna Rau: lol
[19:00] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations galu Capalini, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[19:00] Amy29 Allen: it was so funny
[19:01] You: can you gesture a snort?
[19:01] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Hello deia Klaar, you can be the next winner, so don't go anywhere!
[19:01] Amy29 Allen: i don't know
[19:01] Yariel Rau: lol
[19:01] Amy29 Allen: Adinna you to close
[19:01] Adinna Rau: lol
[19:01] Yariel Rau: the crack head dance
[19:01] Amy29 Allen: for comfort
[19:01] Amy29 Allen: lol
[19:01] You: it brought me comfort
[19:01] Amy29 Allen: no commen
[19:01] You: do you have danceoffs?
[19:01] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations No Schridde, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[19:01] Amy29 Allen: comment**
[19:02] Adinna Rau: Yeah, you can dance at the clubs
[19:02] Adinna Rau: Theres like....58549393838384 of them in SL
[19:02] Amy29 Allen: lol
[19:02] You: i haven't been yet
[19:02] Adinna Rau: Just go to the search button and type something up and you're bound to find it
[19:02] Amy29 Allen: OMG!!
[19:02] Yariel Rau: hi galu
[19:02] Amy29 Allen: put a shirt on woman
[19:03] Adinna Rau: No, I saw you take a picture!
[19:03] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Lyneal Dwi, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[19:03] Amy29 Allen: who
[19:03] Adinna Rau: Nooo!
[19:03] Amy29 Allen: ???
[19:03] Yariel Rau: lol
[19:03] Adinna Rau: lol
[19:03] You: i've been taking a picture every time someone new gets on screen.
[19:03] Amy29 Allen: galu please put a shirt on
[19:03] Adinna spanked Adinna's ass
[19:03] Amy29 Allen: lols
[19:03] Adinna Rau: O.O
[19:03] Adinna Rau: Woops!
[19:03] Yariel Rau: lmao
[19:03] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:03] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:03] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:03] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:03] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:03] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:03] Amy29 Allen: lol
[19:03] Adinna Rau: STOPPIT
[19:03] You: what the hell?
[19:04] Amy29 Allen: you've been a bad girl
[19:04] Yariel Rau: i think galu thinks we are crazy
[19:04] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Lyneal Dwi, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[19:04] Amy29 Allen: we;; we kinda are
[19:04] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Hello Mouse Canning, you can be the next winner, so don't go anywhere!
[19:04] Adinna Rau: I'm not. I don't know what ya'll are talking about
[19:04] Amy29 spanked Amy29's ass
[19:04] Amy29 Allen: woop
[19:04] Adinna Rau: lol
[19:04] Yariel Rau: we should take no to his first club
[19:05] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Vatelemite Tomorrow, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[19:05] Adinna Rau: Hm.. lets take him to Ready or Not. xD
[19:05] Amy29 Allen: i'm goin to my baby
[19:05] Yariel Rau: lol
[19:05] Adinna Rau: Mmk.. Bye Amyyy
[19:05] Adinna spanked Amy29's ass
[19:05] Amy29 Allen: i think he's going to acctual propose
[19:05] You: ok
[19:05] Yariel Rau: and then souki will be there
[19:05] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:05] Adinna Rau: And then Souki will think you and Nooo! are together
[19:06] Adinna Rau: And he'll ask me out. And then we'll get married
[19:06] Yariel Rau: then hell get jealous
[19:06] Adinna Rau: And have little Souki's
[19:06] You: i wouldn't wish that upon anyone
[19:06] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Constant Idler, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[19:06] Amy29 Allen: lol
[19:06] Adinna Rau: lol
[19:06] Adinna spanked Amy29's ass
[19:06] Amy29 Allen: PINEAPPLE!!
[19:06] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:06] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:06] Amy29 Allen: HAHAHA
[19:06] Adinna Rau: ~*BYTCH I'LL FUK YA ASS UP ! *~
[19:06] Yariel Rau: Berries n Cream Berries n Cream, Im a lil lad who loves Berries and Cream.
[19:06] Adinna Rau: lmao
[19:06] Yariel Rau: BERRIES N CREAM BERRIES N CREAM, IMA LIL LAD WHO LOVES BERRIEES AND CREAMMUH!
[19:07] Adinna Rau: BOM CHICA WAH WAH!!!!!!!
[19:07] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Lostris Mills, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[19:07] Yariel Rau: Berries n Cream Berries n Cream, Im a lil lad who loves Berries and Cream.
[19:07] Yariel Rau: BERRIES N CREAM BERRIES N CREAM, IMA LIL LAD WHO LOVES BERRIEES AND CREAMMUH!
[19:07] Adinna Rau: Berries n Cream Berries n Cream, Im a lil lad who loves Berries and Cream.
[19:07] You: how do get the audio?
[19:07] Adinna Rau: BERRIES N CREAM BERRIES N CREAM, IMA LIL LAD WHO LOVES BERRIEES AND CREAMMUH!
[19:07] Amy29 Allen: lol
[19:07] Amy29 Allen: you people crazy
[19:07] Adinna Rau: Say Hi to Ern for me. :P
[19:07] Adinna spanked Amy29's ass
[19:08] Amy29 spanked Adinna's ass
[19:08] Adinna Rau: K, lets take Nooo! to ready or not Yariel :P
[19:08] Amy29 Allen: ok
[19:08] Yariel Rau: kk
[19:08] Diamond Money Ball V2.2g: Congratulations Constant Idler, you won L$ 1 just for being here! Next drawing is within 1 minutes! Stick around to win up to L$ 1!
[19:08] Adinna Rau: TP him.
[19:09] Yariel Rau: ill tp you no
[19:09] You: ok
